I’ve never been one for New Year’s resolutions. I believe that if you have to wait for a specific date to start doing something, it isn’t going to last. My To Do List is part of my constant effort to improve myself because the best time to start is today. During my SoulCycle class tonight, I realized the biggest obstacle in everything I do is myself. I summarize the past to define my present. I am not the number of holiday parties I get invited to, I am not the number of birthday posts on my Facebook wall each year, I am not how quickly I get promoted at work, I am not the brand name on my clothes, I am not the number of dates I’ve been on, and I am not going to allow the people, events, places, and institutions that have hurt me or failed me in the past to account for who I am today.
When I got home, I wrote down everything I could think of that has ever hurt my feelings or made me feel bad on note cards. I flipped through them all to thank them for bringing me where I am today, then said goodbye to these memories that no longer benefit me and my future.
Now that they’re ripped apart, I am letting go of my anxiety, insecurity, and complacency. I am smart, thoughtful, hard-working, and attractive. If I am kind to myself and others, it’s a good day. If I have a bad day, there is another one tomorrow.